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Short Songs in Shorts

by But, Pyrite

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1.
Wear deodorant your pits stink Wear deodorant your pits stink Wear deodorant your pits stink Wear deodorant your pits stink Put some deodorant on your pits They smell so bad No one wants to go near you You smell so bad Put it on put it on Put it on put deodorant on Put it on put it on Put it on put deodorant on Wear deodorant your pits stink Wear deodorant your pits stink Is it your shirt that smells so bad Yes it is Thanks to your gross pits You smell so bad Put it on put it on Put it on put deodorant on Put it on put it on Put it on put deodorant on Wear deodorant your pits stink Wear deodorant your pits stink Scary Boi Crew says your pits stink Wear deodorant your pits stink Wear deodorant your pits stink
2.
Water your plants don’t let the soil dry Water your plants don’t let your plants die Water your plants don’t let the soil dry Water your plants don’t let your plants die Water your plants Water your plants Water your plants Water your plants Water your plants don’t let the soil dry Water your plants don’t let your plants die Water your plants don’t let the soil dry Water your plants don’t let your plants die Water your plants Water your plants Water your plants Water your plants Water your plants Water your plants
3.
Regret 01:36
Every day I wear pants is a day I regret Every day I wear pants is a day I regret Every day I wear pants is a day I regret I don’t need pants I need my knees to breathe My calves need air look at my leg hair Fuck pants shorts are better I’m taking a stance Fuck pants Every day I wear pants is a day I regret Every day I wear pants is a day I regret Get some shorts they’re more flexible And they’re cooler not just temperture Fuck pants they’re so long Get some shorts Fuck pants Every day I wear pants is a day I regret Every day I wear pants is a day I regret Every day I wear pants is a day I regret Every day I wear pants is a day I regret
4.
Sick Dump 01:55
Sick Dump Your heads getting light Sick Dump The pains getting sharp Sick Dump Can you hold it in Sick Dump You gotta get it out Sick Dump Your heads getting light Sick Dump The pains getting sharp Sick Dump Can you hold it in Sick Dump You gotta get it out You have to take a massive dump But you don't know if the bathrooms open Jiggle the handle oh no it's locked Guess you have to kick down Sick Dump Your heads getting light Sick Dump The pains getting sharp Sick Dump Can you hold it in Sick Dump You gotta get it out Sick Dump Your heads getting light Sick Dump The pains getting sharp Sick Dump Can you hold it in Sick Dump You gotta get it out Sit on the toilet the seat is cold It hits the water and splashes up Don't forget to wipe your butt You know what happens if you don't Sick Dump Sick Dump Sick Dump Sick Dump You gotta get it out Get it out Get it out Get that dump out Get it out Get it out Get it out Get that dump out Get it out Sick Dump
5.
Use hot water and dish soap Use the soap to soak the sponge Use the sponge to scrub them down Clean up all your dishes Do the dishes They’re piled to the ceiling Do the dishes Scrub them down Do the dishes They’re piled to the ceiling Do the dishes Scrub them down How much soap did you use It won't cut through the grease Maybe soak it overnight Clean up all your dishes Do the dishes They’re piled to the ceiling Do the dishes Scrub them down Do the dishes They’re piled to the ceiling Do the dishes Scrub them down Do the dishes Do the dishes They’re piled to the ceiling Do the dishes Scrub them down Do the dishes They’re piled to the ceiling Do the dishes Scrub them down
6.
Burn your popcorn honk the car horn We know how much it annoys you Put our feet on your coffee table We know just how sweaty they are We’re the Scary Boi Crew toughest crew around We’re the Scary Boi Crew We’re coming for you Scary Boi Crew we’re coming for you Don’t fuck with us we’re the Scary Boi Crew Clog your toilet flood your bathroom Use up all your toilet paper Kick your house plants ruin your plans We can do whatever we want We’re the Scary Boi Crew toughest crew around We’re the Scary Boi Crew We’re coming for you Scary Boi Crew we’re coming for you Don’t fuck with us we’re the Scary Boi Crew Scary Boi Crew Scary Boi Crew Toughest Crew Around We’re the Scary Boi Crew We’re coming for you Scary Boi Crew we’re coming for you Don’t fuck with us we’re the Scary Boi Crew
7.
Wet Bandits 02:00
Kevin set your traps They've got fingerless gloves Wet bandits got gold teeth They're going to steal fucking wreath Wet bandits gonna break into your house Wet bandits gonna run your faucet Wet bandits gonna break into your house Wet bandits gonna run your faucet They have got no plans They have burned their hands Got hit by a shovel in the face Paint cans fly all over the place Wet bandits gonna break into your house Wet bandits gonna run your faucet Wet bandits gonna break into your house Wet bandits gonna run your faucet Harry and Marv Harry and Marv Harry and Marv Harry and Marv Fuller go easy on the Pepsi Fuller go easy on the Pepsi Harry and Marv
8.
Hydration 02:02
How much water are you drinking The answer is not enough Your mouth is dry what are you thinking Get a glass and drink it up Hydration drink enough water Hydration make sure you get it Hydration don't dry out Hydration get water in your mouth Will you last without water? Chances are you will not Without water your life over You'll pass out and then you're done Hydration drink enough water Hydration make sure you get it Hydration don't dry out Hydration get water in your mouth Scary Boi Crew says to drink water Stay hydrated Stay hydrated Stay hydrated Stay hydrated Stay hydrated Stay hydrated Stay hydrated Stay hydrated
9.
NBA Jam 01:28
Gotta get tough don’t get pushed down In this game there's no fouls Hold the ball before it gets stolen Take the shot REJECTED He’s on fire He’s on fire He’s on fire He’s on fire There’s no fouls in this game This is NBA Jam There’s no fouls in this game This is NBA Jam Use the spin move razzle dazzle He's heating up from downtown Is it the shoes? You better not lose Every jump is GOALTENDING He’s on fire He’s on fire He’s on fire He’s on fire There’s no fouls in this game This is NBA Jam There’s no fouls in this game This is NBA Jam There’s no fouls in this game This is NBA Jam There’s no fouls in this game This is NBA Jam
10.
Shovel the snow Clear a path before someone falls down and breaks their ass If they do they're gonna get a lawyer Then you're screwed because you don't have any money Shovel the snow break your back Shovel the snow so you don’t break the bank Shovel the snow break your back Shovel the snow so you don’t break the bank Clean the sidewalk of the snow So nobody gets any broken bones Except that you will break your back But at least your bank account stays intact Shovel the snow break your back Shovel the snow so you don’t break the bank Shovel the snow break your back Shovel the snow so you don’t break the bank Think you better shovel the snow So you don't get sued and lose your home Put some salt out for the ice Then your neighbors will think you're nice Shovel the snow break your back Shovel the snow so you don’t break the bank Shovel the snow break your back Shovel the snow so you don’t break the bank
11.
How long has it been on the floor One second two seconds three seconds four Sitting there at your feet Pick it up it’s still good to eat How long has it been on the floor One second two seconds three seconds four Sitting there at your feet Pick it up it’s still good to eat Five second rule five second rule You better respect the five second rule Five second rule five second rule You better respect the five second rule How long has it been on the floor One second two seconds three seconds four Sitting there at your feet Pick it up it’s still good to eat How long has it been on the floor One second two seconds three seconds four Sitting there at your feet Pick it up it’s still good to eat Five second rule five second rule You better respect the five second rule Five second rule five second rule You better respect the five second rule Five second rule Five second rule Five second rule Five second rule Five second rule five second rule You better respect the five second rule Five second rule five second rule You better respect the five second rule
12.
Poop Shoes 03:41
What are you gonna do When you step in poo Gonna clean it off your shoe Or leave it stuck to you What are you gonna do When you step in poo Gonna clean it off your shoe Or leave it stuck to you Gotta watch where you're walking Never know what you'll step in Leaving all these brown footprints All over my carpet You're shoes are messed up So is everything that you step on Sometimes you should look down In case of poo on the ground What are you gonna do When you step in poo Gonna clean it off your shoe Or leave it stuck to you Gotta watch where you're walking Never know what you'll step in Leaving all these brown footprints All over my carpet You're shoes are messed up So is everything that you step on Sometimes you should look down In case of poo on the ground What are you gonna do When you step in poo Gonna clean it off your shoe Or leave it stuck to you Stuck to you Stuck to you What are you gonna do When you step in poo Gonna clean it off your shoe Or leave it stuck to you What are you gonna do When you step in poo Gonna clean it off your shoe Or leave it stuck to you

credits

released July 26, 2019

Larry Spahn - Vocals
Matt Splat - Guitar/Vocals
Nairb Halvey - Bass/Vocals
Grandpa Scary - Drums

Recorded at If and Only If Productions in Ridgewood, NY

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